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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25390333">heart of gold</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/191004s/pseuds/191004s'>191004s</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Stray Kids (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Bang Chan is a Sweetheart, Crying, Cuddles, Fever, Idol Life, Insomnia, Its all just soft, M/M, Nightmares, Sick Character, Sickfic, Thunderstorms, chan loves skz, chan really cares, just bang chan loving skz, platonic, they're stressed and tired boys</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 12:20:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,716</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25390333</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/191004s/pseuds/191004s</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>sometimes people think chan is cold hearted, but really he's not.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Bang Chan/Everyone, Bang Chan/Han Jisung | Han, Bang Chan/Hwang Hyunjin, Bang Chan/Kim Seungmin, Bang Chan/Lee Felix, Bang Chan/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Bang Chan/Seo Changbin, Bang Chan/Yang Jeongin | I.N</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>291</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>heart of gold</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>hai...</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>when chan closed the dorms front door behind him upon arrival, it was quiet, it was three in the morning on the thursday, not a single sound was heard or light was on, telling him that everyone was sound asleep and tucked up in their beds, that made chans heart calm a bit knowing everyone was getting some rest.</p><p>he shoved his shoes off and hung his coat up, shuffling his shoes with his foot gently towards the other many sets of shoes, it was a bit cold but at the same time it cozy, so he turned on the front rooms lamp by the tv to only to see someone on the sofa, curled into a ball without a blanket, back facing chan.</p><p>he pouted when he noticed said figure was shaking a little bit, probably from the cold, and he discovered it was minho, hands clenched tight making fists and chan hopped up, he'd wake him up but chan right now was more focused on getting him warmed up in case he got sick, that was the last thing that was wanted.</p><p>chan ran to the extra closet and dragged out one of the extra pillows and one of the big fuzzy blankets that hyunjins mother had sent, dragging it over and sitting on the edge of the sofa, he dropped the blanket to gently lift minhos head and slide the pillow underneath, giving his neck a break and probably saving him from a neck cramp.</p><p>chan slowly maneuvered minho so that he wasnt curled up like he was anymore, chan quickly replacing minhos method of self body warmth with the blanket, tucking him in neatly and making sure the blanket reached up to his chin.</p><p>noticing how messy minhos hair was, chan giggled lightly as he brought his hand up to softly rearrange minhos bangs and hair, flattening it out, he was surprised that minho hadnt woken up, which was also a good thing because minho got antsy when he'd just woken up, but that must've meant he was tired, which also made chan sad.</p><p>he had pretty much figured that minho had cooked dinner for everyone looking at the half washed up dishes, he chuckled, he'd do that later on to save minho the effort of going through the trauma of washing up the plates.</p><p>chan never said for minho to look after 'the kids' as he put it, but minho willingly did when chan was still at the companies building still and wasnt at home, he'd take the role of making sure everyone went to bed and that they'd eaten, reminding jeongin and seungmin to close the bathroom door from when they'd finished, knowing both boys were extremely forgetful when tired.</p><p>he got up and walked to the fridge, grabbing a water bottle and walked back over slowly, placing the bottle down on the table, patting down the blanket around minho before leaning over and kissing his forehead gently, and in return minho let out a little mumble and turned over, turning his back to chan once again.</p><p>-</p><p>chan was in the studio again, but this time it was with seungmin, jisung and changbin had went home with the others, but seungmin gently tugged at chans sleeve before they were due to leave, asking if they could go over some recordings and vocals.</p><p>chan wasnt surprised, he knew how much seungmin cared about his vocals, it wasn't like it was out of the ordinary or the first time that seungmin asked to stay behind, its not like chan had anything to do, so why not spend it helping out the second youngest of the group.</p><p>however today, something was off with seungmin, he'd been more quiet than usual, he didnt pull at hyunjins leg as a joke at all and he semi rejected changbins hugs, chan picked up on it this morning when seungmin gave up on making a bowl of cereal, shoving it towards jeongin, who was confused but didnt pay much attention to his hyungs lack of patience in trying to do stuff.</p><p>as the leader, chan wanted to wait until this was over to confront seungmin, he didnt want to do it now because it'd just plainly overwhelm him, but a walk back with a cold breeze was probably the best situation to talk about stuff.</p><p>"ok seungmin another go" chan said, patience evident in his voice, he was extremely patient as a leader, he took all the time in the world with every member and their lines, treating them delicately and acting as if they had all the time in the world, in which they didnt, but chan wanted to make sure it felt like that so none of them rushed themselves.</p><p>round after round and seungmin still wasnt getting it right for some reason, chan was 1000 percent sure something was up with seungmin seeing he normally was able to get it over and done with instantly, sighing he sat back up and pressed the button.</p><p>"final time because we have to head home soon" chan said, same tone as when they'd just begun in his voice, he waited but seungmins head never turned back towards the microphone, instead had his back turned to chan.</p><p>chan squinted and he watched seungmin for a few more seconds to see that he was shaking gently.</p><p>one of his babies was crying.</p><p>instead of flapping his arms around in panic, chan calmly turned the audio off, grabbed a water bottle and waddled quickly into the booth, closing the door swiftly and walking up to seungmin, who only shyed away from chan instead of wanting the comfort from him, evidently feeling embarrassed that chan was having to see him like this.</p><p>chan wasnt having any of it though, he spun seungmin around and pulled his hands away from his face, enveloping the younger boy in his arms and shushing him quietly, patting his back repeatedly in attempts to calm him down, his heart hurt as he felt the sobs that racked through seungmins body bounce onto him, but he knew seungmin was tired, promotions had exhausted him, all of them even, so this was expected.</p><p>"its ok minnie its ok" he said again, swaying them slightly in a rocking motion to calm seungmin down, which worked, his tears stopped but he was still attached to chan and didnt wanna let go.</p><p>"you're gonna have to let go of me if we're gonna go home button, we'll go get ice cream if you want?" chan said questioningly, already knowing the answer, seungmin let him go hesitantly and dried his eyes.</p><p>"thank you hyung" seungmin murmured quietly, following chan out of the booth.</p><p>-</p><p>chan pulled out his headphone to listen to the storm above in the skies, it wasn't that loud and the storm had only just started, it only caught his attention because as his music had stopped and begun switching to the other song on shuffle, he heard a rumble, out of general curiosity he wondered what it was seeing it could've been one of the boys but it didnt.</p><p>he put his headphones back in and turned the music up higher and closed his eyes, he was tired tonight, genuine exhaustion from weeks of schedules catching up to him and he turned to lie on his back instead of his side, seungmin above him in the top bunk fast asleep.</p><p>however something didnt cross chans mind and that was about how petrified of storms two of the members were, he wasnt surprised when he felt the covers lift up and not one but two bodies crawling up towards him, at first he wasnt phased, probably someone coming over to have a cuddle and sleep, but one of the two bodies had crawled over his side and nearly broke his leg by putting all their pressure on him, making his eyes shoot open.</p><p>hyunjin and felix had climbed into bed, chan taking his earphones out at the exact same time a massive clap of thunder happened and felix quite literally yelped, hiding under the covers, hyunjin was shaking and had lifted chans arms to lie his head on chans chest properly, he'd been the one crushing his legs but he couldnt ignore the big puppy and how much he hated storms.</p><p>chan was getting to grips with the situation and rubbed up and down hyunjins arms gently, trying to settle down the trembles a little bit and ground him, chans head then turned to felix who was under the duvet, chan lifted it and felix peered up at him teary eyed, both of the boys hated storms so much it nearly made them breakdown every time it happened.</p><p>"sweethearts its okay im here" chan sleepily mumbled, lifting his arm and gently and sliding it under felix' neck, tugging the younger into his side, who instantly complied, throwing his leg over chan and pretty much layered itself over hyunjins leg, it was bound to get stuffy, but chan was willing to sacrifice his sleep to comfort the other two.</p><p>"its scary hyung" hyunjin said, felix mumbling out an agree to hyunjins statement, chan wished he could help more but all chan could do was just rub their arms and play with their hair gently to settle them, felix shivering from the goosebumps of chans nails but he wasnt bothered, he just wanted a distraction.</p><p>chan decided to shove his headphones in both the boys ears that were exposed to the open air, half their hearing being blocked because they were leaning against his chest, and chan was pretty sure hyunjin was listening to his heartbeat seeing how calm he'd become, which made chan smile gently.</p><p>"thank you" felix said gently, sleepy but into the air hoping it'd make it to chans ears, which it did and chan smiled, pulling both boys up to kiss their heads gently before letting them rest, chan listening to the storm as it eventually quietened down, being suffocated by other boys' warmth wasnt exactly the nicest seeing it was gonna get stuffy soon but chan couldnt complain knowing he'd coaxed both boys to sleep.</p><p>-</p><p>sometimes when jisung couldnt sleep, jisung would just ignore it and go on his phone until his brain shut itself off, but tonight was different, they had no schedule in the following day, but recently his insomnia had started acting up, which sucked because ji had only just started getting back into a healthier routine, it made him annoyed that it was acting up because he was overthinking stuff.</p><p>he pursed his lips and grumbled, flipping over and lifting the blanket covers, planting his feet on the cold wooden floor and letting himself adjust and he got up, leaving a sleeping jeongin and felix behind in the room, jisung shuffled along the dorms corridor to the front room.</p><p>His eyes landed upon the person he initally went looking for for a hug, bang chan sat on the sofa with a fluffy blanket snug around his shoulders, mug in his hand, eyes glued to the television, he was watching some sappy romantic shit that jisung mentally gagged at as he leaned against the doorframe around the corner, not making himself known just yet, chan had always been a sucker for romance.</p><p>jisung studied chan a little longer than he normally would, he dyed his hair back to black, and his hair was fluffy and it looked like a cloud, he'd obviously just had a shower because his hair was everywhere, it wasn't puffed out in a bad way, more adorable, and jisung swooned a little bit.</p><p>jisung moved himself forward and sat down on the sofa, a good length apart from chan, who only noticed him when he sat down, chan looked at him and acknowledged his presence, smiling a little, and jisung couldn't even smile back at the leader, chan raised his eyebrows and paid his attention back to the television, jisung felt like shit.</p><p>"whats up hannie ah?" chan said as he took a sip from his mug, setting it down on the table and paying his attention to chan, letting the thing he was watching play in the background, so that it wasnt awkward silence between the pair.</p><p>"im tired" he lied.</p><p>"go sleep in my bed then" chan said.</p><p>he loved that idea, but he didnt at the same time, jisung only wanted to curl up in chans arms right now, under that warm blanket and have chan play with his hair gently and watch whatever was on the television, and probably cry the emotions that were stuck in his system out, at this point in time, he wanted to go to sleep.</p><p>"ill pass hyung im fine." he lied again.</p><p>"i dont believe you at all hannie" chan said, giggling lightly, jisungs' face remained deadpan, and chan only pouted, lifting the blanket gently, jisung felt like a dam about to burst, gently he shuffled across the sofa and into chans side, he leaned against him softly and chan gently fiddled with the material of jisungs shirt, and jisung figured out that he was hyperaware and he sunk even further into his side, a warm welcome that was just enough to give him more comfort than he wanted.</p><p>jisung started to cry.</p><p>chan sat up, he'd dealt with this jisung a lot and he knew he was upset about multiple things and that he was blatantly lying about being tired, he missed his parents and hadnt seen them in a while and probably wanted to go home right now, chan wasnt stupid, he'd dealt with everyones homesickness too, and jisung was someone chan hated seeing crying, so he pulled him onto his lap and all jisung could do was fall forward, head against chans shoulder as he cried.</p><p>"hey hey hey.." chan said calmingly, wrapping his arms around jisungs smaller frame, rubbing his back lightly as he cried, jisung was evidently tired and chan had noticed how he hadnt been sleeping again but he thought he'd be able to handle it himself, but evidently not seeing they were in this situation.</p><p>after a few minutes of backrubs jisung had stopped crying and at first chan thought he'd fallen asleep until he sat up, wiping his eyes and apologizing to chan.</p><p>"don't say sorry honey you cant help it" chan said sadly, jisung hummed in reply, settling back down against chan, who assumed he was just gonna stay there and sleep, which chan didnt mind, he could still see the tv and it wasnt like jisung was heavy or crushing him.</p><p>"go to sleep if you can baby, ill carry you to bed later" chan said softly, kissing his cheek.</p><p>-</p><p>"changbin if you dont get out of that studio im gonna have to physically drag you out." chan said sternly, waiting in the doorway as he stared at changbin who had little to no interest in what chan had to say, chan had sent jisung on his way home because he knew this situation was gonna have to be leader on main rapper.</p><p>"changbin" chan repeated, stepping forward, changbin had been in the studio for over a day, presumably sleeping there and not coming home at all, which was ridiculous, not even chan had spent this much time here, chan didnt even know if the boy had been eating.</p><p>"bin you have to come home now so i can look after you properly." still no reply and chan decided to drag the chair changbin was sitting in backwards, away from the desk and changbin protested, hands going up in a tantrum and acting completely out of character.</p><p>"what the hell hyung i was nearly done with that verse" changbin said, voice raising slowly and chan didnt really want to argue with changbin right now.</p><p>"bin, stop it" chan said strictly, resting his hands on his shoulders and looking the younger boy in the eyes, changbin had no intentions of giving up, being ten times as more stubborn as he normally was, chan stared deeply into his eyes and there was hurt, something was playing on his mind but maybe thats for later.</p><p>"i want to finish this" changbin said bluntly, searching chans eyes back, chan only sighed, chan wanted changbin home for at least a day to make sure he was fed and sleeping properly, its not that he didnt trust changbin to look after himself, he was just bad at it.</p><p>"come home for a day and have a rest, please" chan pleaded, watching changbin gently as the rapper slowly let his wall down, chan stared sadly at how tired he looked, bruises under his eyes had begun forming again, changbin sighed, letting chan gently cup his face and stroking at the tears that had slowly begun to fall.</p><p>"i love you ok, we all do, overworking like this isnt the answer" chan said sincerely, making sure changbin got the message, which he did as he broke eye contact, looking down, chan could only sigh, leaning down to kiss his temple gently, it was warm, not sweaty but he was warm, and chan had a bad feeling he was gonna fall ill because of this.</p><p>"im sorry" changbin said, reaching out and grabbing chan, dragging his waist closer and changbin promptly buried his face in chans stomach, still in the chair and had promptly wrapped his legs around chan, keeping him secure, chan pouted, gently tousling with changbins hair for a few minutes.</p><p>"ill buy you dinner and whatever you want if you start packing up" chan said, gently tugging a knot out of changbins hair, changbin looked up, pouting but letting go, listening to chan and his words and packing up his things.</p><p>chan mentally breathed a sigh of relief but now he prayed for his credit card.</p><p>-</p><p>chan was surprised when a completely off colour jeongin walked into the kitchen in the morning, he stared down the youngest of the group and instantly noticed three things, how he was sweating, how pale he was, and how he was shivering.</p><p>"innie are you feeling okay?" chan quizzed gently, but its like the question had stopped mid air for jeongin because the poor boy didnt register it at all, completely dazed and confused, and chan was instantly concerned when jeongins eyes didnt even focus on him.</p><p>he rushed over towards the kitchen drawers and dragged out a thermometer, no one was awake right now, chan had been starting up breakfast when jeongin had unexpectedly walked out, he was definitely calling up jeongins school to say he wasnt coming in today, no way was he letting the younger out of his sights.</p><p>he approached jeongin and coaxed his mouth open gently, sliding the thermometer underneath his tongue and waited for it to beep, he rubbed up and down jeongins side as they waited, and as he drew it back it read 38.7... definitely a fever, just to be extra sure chan wiped it clean and stuck it in his ear, emitting a whine from jeongin at the uncomfortable feeling, again, as he took it away it read 38.7.</p><p>"ok off to bed with you come on baby" chan said, patting his butt and gently helping him walk back to his room, seungmin passed them, a bit shocked as to seeing jeongin in such a sickly state but he walked past, leaving the room empty for chan to handle jeongin alone.</p><p>chan settled him down quickly under the covers, saying he'd be back in a minute and rushing back out into the kitchen, he quickly phoned up the school and said how jeongin wouldnt be coming in and they said their thanks, chan sighed and put it down, grabbing a bowl of water, a cloth, and a little snack and shoving it in his pocket before walking back in, but before he left.</p><p>"channie hyung will jeongin be okay?" seungmin asked quietly, chan pouted at how seungmin was concerned for jeongin, seeing that jeongin was the only one younger than seungmin, he could only keep his eyes out for the younger and make him his priority. </p><p>"yes baby he'll be okay ill look after him" chan reassured, running his hand through seungmins hair quickly before disappearing again.</p><p>chan walked back into the room and jeongin had his eyes closed, evidently tired, however chan had other ideas before he'd let jeongin sleep properly. he turned the fan on and directed it towards the bed, had closed the curtains and turned the light off so it was dark to prevent any headaches, and had only turned on seungmins bedside lamp.</p><p>chan dunked the cloth in the water and rinsed it through before gently setting it down on jeongins head, who only whined and tried to take it off but he had no energy and couldnt even reach his arms up, chan could only sit by him and run his fingers through his hair as the only source of comfort he could give, he undid a few buttons of his pyjama top to let air got to him, the poor baby of the group probably overheating due to the fever.</p><p>chan sat there for hours, scrolling through his phone and every hour or so replacing the cloth on jeongins head, who was still asleep.</p><p>minho had come in and changed the bowl of water, when coming back he set it down, knowing how chan had fallen asleep at the side of the bed, hand holding jeongins gently, he smiled at it and gently ducked his head under the bunk to lean over jeongin, studying the youngers facial features, his eyebrows were drawn what seemed as uncomfort, so minho gently placed his thumb between jeongins brows and massaged the spot lightly, making the youngests eyebrows unknit and go back to normal, making him look peaceful.</p><p>minho giggled lightly and kissed jeongins forehead gently before grabbing seungmins pillow and shoving it under chans head so that he wouldnt get a neck cramp, putting a hand through chans hair lightly which made the leader mumble something out into the air, completely incoherent and minho only walked off, making sure he'd come back in half an hour to check on jeongin or take over from chan.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thought it would've been longer and the fact it took me three days to write 3k is kinda confusing me but hey i hope u enjoy idk if they would be mistakes</p></blockquote></div></div>
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